Introduction
The Book is a Magic Trick
Let me put my cards on the table and I’ll explain exactly how this magic trick works…
The whole book is written intentionally for a male audience. So husbands… I’m going to hand out every scrap of knowledge I know about getting your wife to strip her panties off for you. I can show you how to turn her on so much, she can’t help herself for wanting you so bad.
Now ladies, come closer and I’ll whisper in your ear what the deal really is…
…I’m going to teach him how to be a better man. All you have to do is play along and pretend that the book isn’t really for you. Cool? Okay, shush, give me some space to work…
Okay guys, now that the women have all mysteriously vanished, we can really talk.
Men Want Better Sex, Women Want Better Men
There is a “chicken and the egg” positive feedback cycle with you being a better man and you getting better sex. But all it takes is a little laziness creeping into your relationship and you can hit a patch of not getting enough sex, so you start getting a little moody, so she likes you less, so you get less sex… and then suddenly there’s a negative feedback cycle kicking in creating a slow spiraling death towards a sexless marriage; you want more sex and she wants you to be better, and neither one of you get what they want. You just lie there in bed next to each other lonely and confused as to how you got there.
If you’re the man, you have to fix the problem. This is not one of those “man up” speeches where you get blamed for everything. You have to fix the problem because you are the only one that can fix the problem. She can’t, through an act of willpower, make herself want to have sex with you. Pay attention to the difference here, it’s critical you understand this. She can make herself have sex with you, she just can’t make herself want to have sex with you.
So when you have sex with her, you will know in your heart of hearts, that she does not really want you inside her. Instead of sex with her making you feel loved and accepted, it actually slowly eats you up from the inside. As her husband, the thing you wish most of all is for her to want you in the moments you are joined together. Without feeling her desiring you, your relationship will continue to struggle and flounder into unhappiness.
So she can’t fake it until you make it… because you can’t make it if she fakes it.
However as the husband, you may not even want to become a better man for her, but you can force yourself to take action and become a better man. Once you become that better man, she will begin to want you again and the positive feedback cycle can resume again. Female sexuality responds to male sexuality, so you have to take the lead.
If you are in a low sex marriage and you want more from her, you have to change you to break out of the rut you are both in. Once the positive feedback loop kicks back in again, the relationship can start changing for the better very quickly. I’ve had couples on the brink of divorce say the love and sex is back in as little as two months.
So you can fake it until you make it… and when you make it, she won’t need to fake it. She’ll want you again.
Why You Got Married in the First Place
Let’s be real here – maybe you had some good reasons for marrying your wife – but we both know what really counted was you wanting to have sex with her. You might have done that “Pro and Con” thing with a line down the middle of the page, but whatever was on the “Con” column didn’t matter a damn compared to “I get to screw her!” on the “Pro” side of the page.
I also know that apart from your hobbies, pretty much everything else in your life is just a hoop that you have to jump through to get back to having sex with her. When you jump through all those hoops and the sex just doesn’t happen like you think it should, you get hurt…you get angry…but mostly you’re confused.
You’re confused because you think you’re doing the right things for her, because she probably tells you that’s what she wants you to do. Then everyone tells you that women are so complicated and so hard to understand that a regular guy doesn’t really have a hope of figuring them out. Then a small army of experts will tell you that your problem is you’re not jumping through enough of her hoops! Then when your sex life starts tanking, they all tell you that a declining sex life is normal in a marriage.
Sometimes in the middle of all this she can walk out on you, cheat on you or tell you to leave. So while I am all about getting you laid like tile, there are also serious situations we have to address as well. I’m going to show you how to make the good stuff happen and the bad stuff not happen.
Part One – What She Really Wants
The first part of the book is going to bring you up to speed on how sex really works for men and women. There’s a bit of biology to brush up on first, because when it comes right down to it, sex is about two bodies coming together to try and make a baby. At least that’s been the purpose of sex for millions of years.
This part of the book looks at the disconnection between how women are biologically wired to look for a certain type of mate, but as modern women, they need quite a different sort of man in their life. That biological “wrong wiring” is at the root of the vast majority of marital drama and failure. Better understanding her biological wiring means that you can start to adjust your game plan and start doing things that she really wants. Thankfully, it’s not all about learning the correct technique of loading the dishwasher.
Part Two – The Male Action Plan
Once you’re properly familiar with what she really wants, you’re automatically going to start playing a better game by at least stopping some obvious mistakes. But that’s not enough for me – I want teach you how to actually switch the balance of power in the relationship from her to you. If she’s in charge of your relationship, she doesn’t really respect you as a man and that’s why the sex is so bad. If you’re in charge of the relationship, she will respect you and that’s what turns her on.
In addition to teaching you the basic principles of The Male Action Plan (The MAP), the second part of the book is going to cover several different long term strategies for sexual success. Some are going to be more important to you than others. Test what works best for you, then run with it.
Part Three – Sexy Moves
This is the fun stuff! The Sexy Moves are all small, practical things you can do to inject sexy romance into your day. This is where I teach you how to kiss her, how to touch her, how to make a move on her, how to date her and (gulp!) maybe even spank her a little. Women love this part of the book.
If you want, you can actually dive straight in to Part Three and start trying some of the moves out on her; they are all easy to do and really do work. But you will find them more effective if you read the first parts of the book and understand why they work as they do.
Part Four – When Push Comes To Shove
Part Four also covers critical areas where husbands commonly run into trouble. We can both hope you never have to employ some of these defensive strategies, but knowing you have them in your tool kit is going to make you feel more confident. For example, if you have a clear plan for quickly exposing and dealing with her should she ever cheat on you, she’s not likely to ever risk it. Knowledge is power and power is sexy.
Warnings
Now as your official Genie of the Lamp, I do have a couple of warnings for you.
You can’t bring back the dead – If your relationship is truly over and the divorce is final, it’s usually just best to accept that it’s over and move on. You can try if you want, but it’s a very long shot.
You can’t make anyone fall in love with you – What I’m going to show you will absolutely set the stage for love and sex to flourish, but you can’t actually force that to happen. You may very well do everything I say in this book and your wife can ignore all your changes and still not be sexually interested in you. As you will see in the chapters on doing The MAP, if she doesn’t respond to you, then you will have a very natural progression to leaving her and will be perfectly set up to find a new love who will be excited to have you.
A small technicality – I can promise you that you can have a wife that wants you passionately; I just can’t 100% assure you that it will be your current wife. I wouldn’t want things to get awkward between us later on, so throwing that out there now.
Women Have Exceptionally Good Hearing
Also if the women reading were still here to listen to this discussion between us men, I would give them a warning too.
If you give this book to your husband and he does what I say, he will become a far more attractive man. That means not only will he be more attractive to you, he will be more attractive to other women as well. As your husband steps up his game, you may have to step up yours as well.
